One way to find out

The synapses are slowing. The heart rate is returning to normal. The tension is loosening. The sleep depraved eyes dimming. The whole world goes black. And yet, there is one light gently glowing in the darkness. Understanding is slow, but as the light draws closer the understanding begins to bloom. Until, at last, the petals unfurl, fully revealing their glory. The understanding is complete! I AM DONE!!!

# posted by blueth : 9:55 PM

I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. I'm almost done.

I just have to keep telling myself that........I'm almost done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111oneoneoneoneoneoneone

# posted by blueth : 9:31 PM

Geez, I managed to ramble on. :p

# posted by blueth : 11:40 PM

Despite "contemplate" being the first word used to describe this blog, it is usually the least used option in my posts. Part of this is because I feel that the written word, or typed in this case, is really a poor form of communication. There is so much that cannot be conveyed in the written word that we take for granted in our face-to-face communications. All of the little nuances of the speaker that we can't always put into words and yet we perceive. The facial expressions, gestures, posture, and delivery of the idea that we pick up on, but can miss in a written document or misinterpret the author's original intent. I have seen to many people scan through a document trying to find faults to harp on without ever trying to understand what is trying to be conveyed. Part of this is me and the way I operate. My friends know that I am usually the one to play the "devil's advocate." If everyone is coming down upon someone or something, unless I feel strongly the same way, I will try to point out what may have been missed or misunderstood as I want to make sure everything has been considered and evaluated before final judgment is passed. This could be due to me sometimes feeling as if I am the only optimist hiding within a pack of cynics and, thus, must take the opposite side at times to counterbalance the massive amount of negative energy put out by the cynics. Regardless, that is a thought for another here and now.

This brings me back to my topic of contemplation, well not really, but I am going to pretend it did. As I was sitting in the labs staring at the monitor's screen, I found my mind had been captivated, removed and thrown from my body to soar in an all-encompassing euphoria. It was gently returned 78 seconds later and I marveled. What could mesmerize me this way? What could disengage me from my boring shift, pounding headache, and worries of the day? The answer was simple and yet complex. Music. It wasn't some profoundly imaginative or even that great of a song that did this to me. The song is called My Coco by Stellastarr. I don't even know what the hell "my Coco" means, but that isn't what caught me up. What did me in came wrapped in soft strummings soon met by slight discordant clashes that served to remove me from this plane. I was then pulled along as the gentle strummings became more earnest and insistent. Their crescendoing a more than sufficient counterbalance to the drudgery of this world and I was suddenly flying. Gliding along with the rise and fall of the guitar I was lost to all, until the fade of the climax and the guitar slipped peacefully into the background of the song. Weaving its magic throughout the song, but never as overtly or with such abandon as what was just witnessed.

I will admit that I am somewhat biased. You see, what I search for most in a song is the guitar. I love it. There are few songs I enjoy that don't have some form of it nestled within. The guitar is the only instrument that truly sings to my heart. The contemplation I so blithely mentioned in the first two paragraphs, but never got around to developing, is this: Music. For as long as I can remember it has been a part of my life. The first thing I do when I get in my car is turn the radio on. The first thing I do when I get back to my house is turn my play list on. In fact, it is hard for me to imagine what life would be like not surround by music. What is it that is so compelling about it? Why is it the only thing that I can truly get caught up in, whether it is in worship or in leisure? From my earliest years, I have been fascinated with the guitar in particular. It was the only instrument that seemed to be in tune with and could fully express the way I felt. I remember being forced to learn the piano, but I quickly disliked it as I could never truly meld with it. The piano could never release me from this world. It wasn't until my first year of college, in Chicago, that I was finally able to take up the guitar and with it my first love. I can't say that I was as diligent at practicing as I could have been, but it was never a burden. By the end of that first year I was able to play pieces, though not being my normal style of music, I could lose myself in the playing of. Then I came here and in the daily grind I found that dust had settled on something that had been vibrant and alive. I had lost something. The sorrow of the losing somehow crushed the will of regaining. I would try to pick it up again, but always the sorrow of what I had lost would make the attempts seem pointless. Will the change from the busyness of college enliven my fingers again? I hope so, but there is only one way to find out.

For now, I will continue to pick out the soulful singing of the guitar from the interweavings of magic that the mundane call music. Allowing myself to be carried on the backs of others, but one day I may again be able to transport myself and maybe others on a journey strung with emotions almost overpowering and yet able to set you free for a time.

# posted by blueth : 11:39 PM

Hahahahahahhahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
Ok new comic...prolly only funy to those who have read Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time saga, but oh well.

2 1/2 weeks till I graduate!!!

# posted by blueth : 10:32 PM

"He could visualize her face in front of him now, wisps of her brown hair twitching restlessly in the wind around the edge of her bright red ski cap, the smooth skin of her forehead stressed and wrinkled." from Manta's Gift by Timothy Zahn.

Your turn:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 23.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.

from Amy

And yes I'm slow, I know.

# posted by blueth : 8:31 AM

Ah! the fun preparations for life away from LeTourneau. I will have only one class left after this semester. The evil Physics II. Have I mentioned that I hate that class? By the way, I hate that class!!!! I will be taking the class over the summer to finish my degree. The only question is, "Where?" I am considering staying at my parent's house for the summer in Colorado Springs and take it at the University of Colorado. Who knows? Without the strict policy on drinking that this school has I can go to each classed buzzed and maybe that will make each class way more enjoyable. One way to find out! ;) mwaahahahaahahah...hahhaa...haha...ha

On another note, I'm tired and ready to be done with work. Maybe I shall take a discreet nap.

# posted by blueth : 9:27 PM

Hahaha...I mean, poor oranges :(

# posted by blueth : 8:37 AM